“Be like a duck. Calm on the surface but paddling like the dickens underneath.”

~Michael Caine

Monday, September 29, 2008

Hello? Oh Hi 30, you're early...

...I didn't expect you for a few more weeks.

I'm rapidly approaching 30 (I hope my local readers show up to my super awesome party. If you didn't get an invite, send me an email.). So far, I think I've taken it pretty well. I don't feel 30, I'm told I don't look 30 and I know I don't act 30. But tonight I discovered 3 things that are definitely signs that I'm turning the big three-oh.
While shaving my legs in the shower tonight, I noticed the usual scratches and bruises that I get because I'm clumsy. I have honorably passed this trait down to my 4 year old as our legs often match. At least she always enthusiastically points it out, 'Look Mommy, you have a boo boo on your leg just like me!' I was being cautious not to run over the scratches with my razor for fear of taking the scab off and making it bleed again. I put my self in the weird backwards leg position (the one only ladies are familiar with) twisting my body one way and my leg the other. You must be in this position to achieve optimum hair removal. In doing this, I noticed a weird blue line on the back of my leg. I initially thought that Tommy must have attempted to make my leg part of his doodle du jour. I attempted to scrub it with my loofah to no avail. What the hell was this stuff? I know that permanent marker is permanent but jeez! This stuff wouldn't budge. I stuck my leg our of the shower to get a better look. Ladies and Gentleman, I discovered that this was not a product of my son's fine artwork, it's a vein. Where did it come from? How did it just pop up overnight? Maybe I'm just paying closer attention lately? Next, while toweling off, I put my hair in one of those turban things and looked in the mirror. I leaned a little closer to find...Wanna guess? Yep, wrinkles. Perfectly placed on the sides of each of my eyes. Ok, I admit it, you have to look REALLY close, but I saw them, I swear! Shortly after finding my protruding vein and my crows feet, I found the ever age defining Gray Hair. Well, I guess that's it. I'm officially old. Not old in the sense that I'm knocking on heavens (or hells) door. But old as in I probably couldn't pull off a panache mini dress and swanky heels in a night club anymore. Not that I would want to. But, it would be nice to have the body I had when I married the man of my dreams. Thank goodness he loves me anyway.
So, here I am, veiny, stretch marked, wrinkled and grey. Hopefully, Ty won't notice. I sure as hell won't tell him. Boy do I have him fooled!

6 comments:

Bay said...

Hey, 60 is the new 40, so you're still just a kid. And those are not wrinkles, they're laugh lines.

Andy said...

So if 60 is the new 40, then that would make 30 the new 20. Which means you're old enough to vote, but can't buy beer.

I hate this new-fangled math.

beebee said...

zNot to sound too philosophical but, all of the signs you just pointed out are guess what? Trophies!!!!!!!! It means you're running the race and you are winning. How great is a laugh line? Better than a frown line. Anyway, all of it is a whole lot better than the alternative.

:: DIGIHEAD :: said...

awwwww, I remember 30. I dont remember 20, because that's a long ass time ago, and Ty made me drink a lot of poor quality beer.

GranMaman / Nan-San said...

Hey Britt,
I can honestly say that I don't even remember my 30th. Now I'm double that plus and still having a blast with life. Maybe sometimes a little slower, but me, my veins, my "laugh lines, and now, a little more "padding" around the once 20 inch waist! Did you know there are Spanx that go all the way up your abdomen? I love the inventions of the 21st century!! As for all the rest, they're just the signs that Mother Nature bestows upon all that deserve. She skips people that don't have love in their hearts and grumpy looks all the time. Aren't you happy she didn't skip us? Love you much,
Nanny.

Baby Girl Names said...

happy birthday . 30 it's not much,you'r still young