“Be like a duck. Calm on the surface but paddling like the dickens underneath.”

~Michael Caine

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Don't remind me...

...that I'm fat. I know, I know I can hear your eyes rolling as you read this but, hear me out. For heavens sakes isn't there an unspoken/unwritten rule not to ask a woman if shs is pregnant?!? Come on people! I regularly get asked one of two questions. First 'When are you due?' or the latter [while placing a hand on my abdomen] 'Are you?'. Give me a flippin break! If you aren't absolutely, positively, without-a-shadow-of-a-doubt certain that the woman you are talking to could push a baby out at any moment, YOU SHOULDN'T ASK!!!

Should I feel sorry for myself that I'm still carrying around all this baby weight even though I eat the same healthy BORING breakfast and lunch while desperately trying to convince myself that I'm not bored eating the same thing every day? No...I don't like sitting on the pity pot and when I do, it's not for very long.
Should I feel sorry for the person that asked the stupid question? ABSOLUTELY NOT! You opened the door to the embarrassment chamber, you should suffer through the torture of being embarrassed.
Am I wearing my clothes too tight? Well, I believe that I don't. I purposely buy clothes a little on the large side to avoid the cling. Of course, if I'm ever in a pinch, I have a pair of Spanx. However, I don't enjoy the feeling of being stuffed into a sausage casing.
Should I excercise? Probably. But I'd have to get up at the crack of dawn before the kids get up. Or, I could wait till I got home from work, after I fed and bathed the kids, finished the laundry, cleaned the kitchen and straightened up the house and after they all went to bed maybe I could get a walk in. But, then it's too late and who would or should walk alone at night? Or maybe I just don't want to excercise. I'm sure that if I really, really, really wanted to I would find a way. It's not like I sit around like a bump on a log. I'm always busy doing something.

So, if you pass a woman who looks pregnant, do me a favor...Don't ask her anything related to pregnancy. There is a possibility she may just be a little chubby (like me) and you wouldn't want to hurt her feelings or be embarrassed. Yes, being pregnant is cute and fun and new and exciting, and yada, yada, yada. I know it might be tempting but just KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT! The rule is no longer unspoken or unwritten. Consider this posting as official documentation.


GranMaman / Nan-San said...

Mama Duck, you should be an author. It is so great to hear about you and your wonderful family. Your Louisiana (and one transplanted in Texas) limbs of your family tree all love you and your family and love reading about you and yours!!

Today's posting was oh so true. It seems like in today's society, anything is okay. I can imagine the grief we'd have received way back when had we,said something so very rude and our parents heard about it. Okay, it's cute when a little one does it, but that's where the line is drawn.

As you well know, I grew up very thin, and I cried many a time because of the things said to or about me. The nicknames were bad enough, but to have complete stangers ask why you are so "skinny" was devastating to a teenager that was so slender, wore glasses and had braces on her teeth!

Well, I survived it all and today I'm complaining because I have "belly bulges"! Did you ever think your Nanny would weigh 140 pounds?

My only suggestion is next time something rude is asked; a simple answer is to ask that impolite person why they felt it was necessary to know. Go get 'em girl -- if we chip away a little at a time, maybe we can eventually get a few people to learn manners.

I love and miss you and yours Can't wait to see y'all next month.

GranMaman / Nan-San

Bay said...

I think you're beautiful so the next time someone says that to you ask them -- "No I'm not, are you!" or call me and I'll go beat them up.